Welcome to The Nook
The Nook is a carefully curated collection of articles, essays, ideas and experiences about therapy, relationships and being human.
Some people arrive here with a particular question. Others simply find themselves browsing. However you have found your way here, I hope something speaks to you.
The Nook brings together a selection of my own articles alongside contributions from a growing circle of invited writers I have come to know, respect and value over more than 25 years in the psychotherapy and counselling professions. Each writes from their own experience and perspective, enriching the conversation in different ways.
Whether you've visited before, during or after therapy – or simply because you enjoy thoughtful writing – I hope there is something meaningful to find.
There is no right place to begin.
Curious reading to you.
(If you'd like to browse all of the therapy writing published on Therapy Place, including pieces not featured in The Nook, you can also visit the complete blog stream.)
New arrivals
New pieces find their way to The Nook from time to time. If you’d like me to email you when something arrives, simply click the button below and ask to be added to the list.
Shelf 1 reads: Step into this experience
Take a seat beside another life for a moment. Understanding can grow quietly by staying here.
Is it depression or do I hate my child?
A quiet café. An ordinary family. But one momentary expression has stayed with Duncan E. Stafford for years.
New: I’m different; I just didn’t know in how many ways
For years, something never quite fitted. Counsellor Heather Oglesby reflects on finally understanding why.
The transmission of therapeutic presence
Duncan E. Stafford reflects on the idea that some lessons arrive through words. Others are quietly inherited.
New: When grief has no clear shape:
Much Love, your brother
Some losses never quite leave us. Instead, they quietly shape the people we become and the lives we imagine might have been.
Shelf 2 reads: Find yourself here
Another person's words can quietly illuminate our own experience. We realise we are not so alone.
Coming Soon: Procrastination
If you've ever wondered where the morning went, Jackie Fernandez's poem may feel uncomfortably familiar.
Adult children of unavailable parents
Therapist Duncan E. Stafford reflects on why some children never stop waiting. Even as adults, they answer the phone, provide the care and hold onto the quiet hope that this time, perhaps, a parent will finally see them.
Behind the mask
Therapist Duncan E. Stafford reflects on why some people don't spend their days being themselves. They spend them performing someone they hope the world will find easier to accept.
New: Downsizing and comprehension
The hardest things to part with are rarely the things themselves. Retired counsellor and supervisor Chris Kell reflects on ageing, attachment and the unexpected freedom of beginning again.
Shelf 3 reads: Understand this a little more
Ideas that help us make sense of ourselves and one another.
Getting to know your ADHD brain: the cerebellum
Psychotherapist and ADHD coach Duncan E. Stafford explores why the cerebellum may hold important clues to understanding the everyday challenges of ADHD beyond attention and impulsivity.
Why people with ADHD procrastinate
Psychotherapist and ADHD coach Duncan E. Stafford explains the hidden brain mechanisms behind ADHD procrastination and why understanding them is the first step towards finding strategies that actually work
Why relationships struggle
Couples therapist Duncan E. Stafford explains why relationships rarely fall apart overnight; they slowly unravel as communication gives way to misunderstanding, defensiveness and power struggles.
Shelf 4 reads: Try a different lens
The most important change is not in the facts but in the way we see them.
ADHD? ME?
Jackie Fernandez shares a sharply observed poem about the bewildering moment when decades of self-doubt suddenly begin to make sense.
New: "The jungle" vs "The safari park"
Sometimes a single metaphor can change how we understand the times we live in. Jasna Levinger-Goy offers one worth considering.
The unfinished revolutions of ADHD minds
What if we've built society around one way of thinking, then mistaken it for the only way minds can contribute?
Shelf 5 reads: Lucky dip
Sometimes curiosity is reason enough.
New:
The soup of society
Taking a morning walk through the city, psychotherapist and counsellor Duncan E. Stafford finds himself thinking about the people we so easily overlook.
The Zen of Frank
Some people teach us by answering questions. Others quietly change the questions we spend the rest of our lives asking.
New: Pete, ELIZA and me
What if artificial intelligence reveals less about machines than it does about the extraordinary ways human beings create relationship?
Get In Touch
You are welcome to contact me but please be aware that my practice is often very busy. I review potential work carefully to ensure a good clinical fit.
To arrange an initial session or for further information, you can contact me via duncan@therapy-space.co.uk by using the contact form below, or by text or phone on 07871 257 457
Please note that responses may take several days but I aim to respond to all professional enquiries within a week.