Women, counselling and psychotherapy
Many women choose to work with a female therapist. Others intentionally seek a male therapist.
The decision is rarely superficial. It is often rooted in personal history, relational experience and an intuitive sense that something different is required.
Since entering the profession in the early 2000s, I have come to understand that for some women, working with a man creates a distinct therapeutic opportunity. The gender of the therapist becomes part of the psychological field. It is not incidental. It carries meaning.
Women tend to approach me when:
- abuse or emotional harm was carried out by a mother or significant female figure
- a father or important male presence was lost, absent or emotionally unavailable
- there has been conflict or harm within a relationship with a woman
- they wish to examine longstanding relational patterns with men in a live and boundaried setting
- they are partnered with a man experiencing sexual difficulties and need space for their own emotional and relational thinking.
In these contexts, therapy is not solely about insight. It is about experience. Patterns relating to authority, safety, intimacy, anger, desire or dependency often emerge in the room itself. What has previously been managed, avoided or enacted can be observed and understood.
The work
The work is collaborative and psychologically rigorous. I attend closely to what is said and what is not said. I am prepared to name dynamics when it is useful and to tolerate complexity without rushing to resolve it. For many women, this offers a different encounter with a male presence than those that shaped earlier experience.
There is space for seriousness and space for lightness. Depth does not require heaviness.
I work in person in Bristol, BS1, and online across the UK and internationally. The frame remains consistent and considered in either setting.
Taking the first step
If you are considering therapy, an initial contact allows us to determine whether I have space to offer and if the work would be purposeful for you and appropriate within my practice. Therapy is a deliberate undertaking. I am attentive to fit, timing and readiness, and I work best where there is mutual commitment to depth rather than urgency for quick solutions.
therapyplace.org
Face-to-face and online counselling, psychotherapy and sex therapy for women, men and couples with Duncan E. Stafford
